Month: September 2014

9 Things Successful People Won’t Do

Check out these nine key things that you can avoid in order to increase your emotional intelligence and performance.

1. They Won’t Let Anyone Limit Their Joy

When your sense of pleasure and satisfaction are derived from comparing yourself to others, you are no longer the master of your own happiness. When emotionally intelligent people feel good about something that they’ve done, they won’t let anyone’s opinions or accomplishments take that away from them.

While it’s impossible to turn off your reactions to what others think of you, you don’t have to compare yourself to others, and you can always take people’s opinions with a grain of salt. That way, no matter what other people are thinking or doing, your self-worth comes from within. Regardless of what people think of you at any particular moment, one thing is certain—you’re never as good or bad as they say you are.

2. They Won’t Forget

Emotionally intelligent people are quick to forgive, but that doesn’t mean that they forget. Forgiveness requires letting go of what’s happened so that you can move on. It doesn’t mean you’ll give a wrongdoer another chance. Emotionally intelligent people are unwilling to be bogged down unnecessarily by others’ mistakes, so they let them go quickly and are assertive in protecting themselves from future harm.

3. They Won’t Die in the Fight

Emotionally intelligent people know how important it is to live to fight another day. In conflict, unchecked emotion makes you dig your heels in and fight the kind of battle that can leave you severely damaged. When you read and respond to your emotions, you’re able to choose your battles wisely and only stand your ground when the time is right.

4. They Won’t Prioritize Perfection

Emotionally intelligent people won’t set perfection as their target because they know it doesn’t exist. Human beings, by our very nature, are fallible. When perfection is your goal, you’re always left with a nagging sense of failure, and you end up spending your time lamenting what you failed to accomplish and what you should have done differently instead of enjoying what you were able to achieve.

5. They Won’t Live in the Past

Failure can erode your self-confidence and make it hard to believe you’ll achieve a better outcome in the future. Most of the time, failure results from taking risks and trying to achieve something that isn’t easy. Emotionally intelligent people know that success lies in their ability to rise in the face of failure, and they can’t do this when they’re living in the past. Anything worth achieving is going to require you to take some risks, and you can’t allow failure to stop you from believing in your ability to succeed. When you live in the past, that is exactly what happens, and your past becomes your present, preventing you from moving forward.

6. They Won’t Dwell on Problems

Where you focus your attention determines your emotional state. When you fixate on the problems that you’re facing, you create and prolong negative emotions and stress, which hinders performance. When you focus on actions to better yourself and your circumstances, you create a sense of personal efficacy that produces positive emotions and improves performance. Emotionally intelligent people won’t dwell on problems because they know they’re most effective when they focus on solutions.

7. They Won’t Hang Around Negative People

Complainers are bad news because they wallow in their problems and fail to focus on solutions. They want people to join their pity party so that they can feel better about themselves. People often feel pressure to listen to complainers because they don’t want to be seen as callous or rude, but there’s a fine line between lending a sympathetic ear and getting sucked into their negative emotional spiral. You can avoid getting drawn in only by setting limits and distancing yourself when necessary. Think of it this way: if a person were smoking, would you sit there all afternoon inhaling the second-hand smoke? You’d distance yourself, and you should do the same with complainers. A great way to set limits is to ask complainers how they intend to fix a problem. The complainer will then either quiet down or redirect the conversation in a productive direction.

8. They Won’t Hold Grudges

The negative emotions that come with holding onto a grudge are actually a stress response. Just thinking about the event involved sends your body into fight-or-flight mode. When a threat is imminent, this reaction is essential to your survival, but when a threat is ancient history, holding onto that stress wreaks havoc on your body and can have devastating health consequences over time. In fact, researchers at Emory University have shown that holding onto stress contributes to high blood pressure and heart disease. Holding onto a grudge means you’re holding onto stress, and emotionally intelligent people know to avoid this at all costs. Learning to let go of a grudge will not only make you feel better now but can also improve your health.

9. They Won’t Say Yes Unless They Really Want To

Research conducted at the University of California in San Francisco shows that the more difficulty that you have saying no, the more likely you are to experience stress, burnout, and even depression. Saying no is indeed a major challenge for most people. “No” is a powerful word that you should not be afraid to wield. When it’s time to say no, emotionally intelligent people avoid phrases like “I don’t think I can” or “I’m not certain.” Saying no to a new commitment honors your existing commitments and gives you the opportunity to successfully fulfill them.

(Dr. Travis Bradberry)

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Three Benefits Of Losing A Good Employee

Losing a star employee can be a good thing. Say what? 

There are many people who feel that we’re all going to have to work harder to hang on those good employees and temps because the job market is heating up. They have more choices, there will be lots of job jumping, blah, blah blah.

A couple of organizational behavior experts over in Europe have come out with a counter-intuitive viewpoint contending that firms can actually benefit from losing employees. Here are three benefits….

  1. Gaining information about what competitors are doing is critical. When people move from one company to another they often maintain contact with their former employers, while creating new connections in the new place of employment. These contacts result in an informal communication bridge between the two and through this bridge the ‘source’ can learn what is going on at competitors.
  2. Departed employees can be a source influence in the industry. This is because departed employees expose competitors to the previous employers operating philosophies and principles, which may lead to an increase in the industry’s perception of that company.
  3. Departures enable organizational turnover. When employees and/or temps leave, they provide room for new people to come with their unique experiences from the outside. This brings in fresh ideas, positively impacting creative performance.

Top companies who know this and do not hesitate to ask their young analysts to leave for a while, before coming back as associates. Let them come back if they wish; some degree of turnover is good for employers and for employees.

Of course, the researchers say too many departures can be bad. They found after a certain point too much loss disrupts day-to-day operations.

That it is recommended that companies develop strategies for managing departed talent, in addition to strategies for keeping the existing talent.

Bottom line? Letting some people go is healthy and the biggest beneficiaries of talent loss will be firms which recognize that departed employees and their networks are important drivers of competitive advantage.

“In the 21st century the whole global economy should learn how to benefit from well-managed professional mobility.”

Are you buying it? Or do you think it’s a bunch of BS from some academicians from across the pond who don’t live in the real world? Let us know.

(staffingtalk.com)